My partner and I recently went through a breakup. During our relationship, he developed a close relationship with my dog. As the dog got older, we joked about cloning him to keep him in our lives. If barbra streisand could do itWhy couldn’t we? Then the joke became reality: When my dog turned 12, we cloned him. It’s a pleasure to see him as a child! (I rescued her when she was older.) Then there was the breakup. I’m taking care of the big dog, but we can’t agree on who should get the little dog. I consider him a part of my dog and want to keep him. He argues that it is selfish of me and that we should get a dog in the breakup. (Note: He paid most of the cost of the cloning, about $50,000, and we share care of the dog.) Thoughts?
As an exercise in tolerance and compassion, I’m putting aside any desire to judge you and your former partner’s decisions here, and I hope readers will do the same. (“How dare they clone a dog when so many other dogs need homes?”) The fact is, there are now two living creatures, both beloved by their caretakers. I’m sorry to trouble you with making the new arrangements, but it looks like you’ll have to do it.
Having lived with dogs for a long time, I can’t help but think of their well-being first. Disrupt your dog’s life as little as possible. Keep them together if possible. (They probably spend more time together than the two of you.) And let them be in the same environment, if possible: Most dogs thrive on routine.
Still, there’s no getting away from the fact that your former partner paid most of the $50,000 in cloning costs. This is persuasive proof of ownership stake. If the younger dog tolerates it well and geography allows, try sharing custody of him — or maybe both of them — alternating weekly. Or offer to pay your ex’s financial outlay. If none of these options work, let him take the smaller dog and help him make the transition that is easier for him.
Neither a borrower nor a merchant?
I was sitting on the lawn at an outdoor concert and I struck up a conversation with a couple sitting behind me in folding chairs. (They told me they were coming from ecstasy, which is an illegal party drug.) When they left early, I asked to borrow one of the chairs. The man agreed and said that I could return it to his brother who lived nearby. After they left I got up to dance and when I returned the chair was missing. Later, I texted the man to apologize and he sent me a screenshot of the chair. Its cost was $150. I didn’t know it would be so expensive! He even offered to give me an ecstasy pill when I paid him. I told him I couldn’t afford a chair change and didn’t want any medicine, which caused him to send me a series of nasty messages. Before I paid him one-third of the price quoted, I told him that I wouldn’t leave feeling like a bad person: He was the one who gave up his chair to a stranger. And he is a drug dealer. What should I have done?
I don’t care whether you borrowed the chair from the Dalai Lama or Charles Manson: it’s your responsibility to replace it. (If you are not able to do so now, pay it off in monthly installments.) Trying to get rid of your debts with ad hoc attacks on your lender is an unnatural move. The guy did a good job by letting you use his chair, and you were careless about it. pay him.
‘Everything We Need’ Isn’t Everything
An old friend is getting married for the second time. He is middle aged and affluent like me. When the invitation arrived, I asked if he and his partner were registered somewhere. They replied: “We have everything we need.” When my husband and I got married during the pandemic, we canceled our wedding plans. No one sent us cards or gifts, and even if there were parties, we didn’t want them. Still, I don’t want to break etiquette or look cheesy. Should we give a gift?
I’m confused by the analogy to your own canceled wedding plans. I’m sorry if your feelings were hurt that the guys didn’t approve of your big day – although you’re saying they didn’t. However, unlike you, your friend is hosting a wedding and a reception. I would write at least one congratulatory card to the couple, and give them a small gift or take them to a celebratory dinner.
Avoid mildew and dirty looks in one easy step
I live in an apartment building that has a small community laundry room. Lately, people have been leaving their clothes in machines after the cycle has finished, sometimes for hours. So far, I’ve avoided taking someone’s clothes off the machine so I can put mine in, but it’s getting more and more tempting. am i allowed
There’s a balancing act here between shared resources (washer and dryer) and the sanctity of our sheets, towels, and underthings. Personally, I’d leave the laundry alone for 30 minutes (15 minutes if you’re in a hurry), then put it away, leaving a friendly note that you waited a half hour.